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March 30, 2013

Insight in Our Tender Heart...

…at least at school.

My precious Baby A has continued to be a little more emotional, but at least I have insight into what was troubling her at school over the past week.

Poor Mrs. G addressed me in the hallway before school was out on Tuesday.  I think it’s my fault, and I just feel terrible.  This sweet lady has a heart of solid gold, and she was almost in tears herself, telling me what happened.

Mrs. G told me that she was feeling really warm in the classroom that day.  She saw that A was dressed in a sweater and turtleneck, and she thought she was probably too warm, too.  She took off A’s sweater, and A started to cry.  She said that A was fine, as soon as they went out into the hallway for bathroom time and A was able to get her sweater out of her cubby. 

This triggered her to think about the prior week, when she called me to come get A.  She said that she had taken her sweater off that day, too, and hadn’t realized it had bothered her.

If my Baby A weren’t in a heightened emotional state, I don’t think this would bother her…but at least we figured out what was setting her off at school.

Sweet Mrs. G felt so bad, I just knew.  I couldn’t bear to tell her the backstory, at least on Tuesday…

Over the prior weekend, Baby A had asked to wear her panda sweater.  It wasn’t clean, so I told her I would make sure to wash it and she could wear it to school on Tuesday.  Our girls don’t usually seem to focus much on what they’re wearing, but she was really set on that sweater for some reason.  She talked on Sunday and Monday that she was excited to go to school on Tuesday and wear her panda sweater.

Then, Tuesday morning as we were getting dressed, Baby A said to me, “And if I get hot at school, I can take off my sweater,” since she was wearing a turtleneck underneath it.

It was a very cold day, and I am not wild about changing clothes in front of people, so I told her, “You can if you really need to, but I hope you’ll be able to wear your clothes as they are.”

So…not only was my Baby A wearing her coveted panda sweater, but I had specifically asked her not to take it off.

I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.

The takeaway…from Mrs. G at school, and later from me, at home…was that it’s OK to tell someone – even a teacher – if they are asking you to do something you don’t want to.  You are not in trouble if you say politely, “I don’t want to take my sweater off.”

If only all life’s problems were as easily solved.

(My gut is that A's sensitivity will pass, if history is any indication.  I do have some thoughts along the lines of the Five Love Languages...for another post.)


Julia said...

Oh. Your sweet girl! She sounds like me. I was also such a pleaser, and always afraid of "getting into trouble". I'm looking forward to your love languages post!! :)

Mandy said...

is this where the "bless her heart" comes from? That is too much!! I hope she gets herself sorted soon. I can't imagine what she would be like is some splotch of paint befell her panda sweater!

Marcia (123 blog) said...

I'm so pleased you were able to figure it all out - it would have bugged/ niggled me for ages!

So can we see a pic of the famous Panda sweater? :) :)

As I said, K is very sensitive too and i just keep reinforcing that it's okay to be verbal (as long as you're respectful) and tell people what you want or don't want. But of course, this is going to be something we talk about for years....

HAPPY EASTER to my favourite family in Kentucky!

Rebecca @ Unexplained X2 said...

Oh, sweet girl!

This is like when I told Matt not to interrupt his tae kwon do instructor and he ended up peeing right there on the floor.

cat said...

Oh gosh, girls! My A is still today a sensitive child.