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October 13, 2010

Sneaking in Some One-on-One Time

Our girls knew each other before we knew them. And they’ve been side by side (or top to bottom) from the very start.

While I envision a day where I’ll take Baby A to the grocery store, while Daddy takes Baby B to the park, we’re just not there yet. To date, our girls have had very little time apart. The only real examples I can think of are a couple of doctor visits over the past 21 months…not exactly the fun and games of a Grocery Store Wonderland and a Great Park Adventure!

Our family schedule – coupled with the girls’ young age – just hasn’t allowed us to “single date” (as opposed to “double date”, of course).

I decided to get creative and try to carve out even little bits of individual time. Whereas I’ve been bathing the girls together for a long time, and before that we would all crowd in the bathroom together, the “dry” baby safely strapped in the bouncy seat, I thought bath time might be a good first step.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been taking one baby at a time upstairs for a bath. With “just one” kiddo to juggle, we’ve had the most fun exploring bubbles, pouring water from one cup to another, and making funny soap sculptures. The other baby is downstairs for one-on-one time with Daddy.

The first time we did this, Baby B was a little uneasy. She wanted to be facing me at all times in the tub, for example, and I could hear her calling, “Sissy!” from downstairs while Baby A was upstairs with me.

The second time went more smoothly, and by the third time, I think Baby B began to appreciate the luxury of having the entire tub to herself…and what girl doesn’t love to lounge in the tub???

Sure, it takes a little more time – all the playing in the tub, plus twice the set-up and clean-up – but I think it’s a good start.

And at least I’ll have a couple of extra-clean babies when we finally do get to “single date” one day.


Christina said...

That's awesome, and a great idea. I haven't separated mine to much. Good or bad? Don't know yet, lol. :)

Liz said...

We haven't done it too often but when we have the other twin seems to looking around for the other. I love that they have each other as playmates.
As far as baths it's great to bathe them together cause then bath time goes by quicker but that tub is getting really small.

Deanna said...

We try to do things separate sometimes on the weekends when we are all home together. If one of us is making a quick trip to the store, we usually take one of the girls with us. A couple of times, I have taken one baby with me to a bridal or baby shower...rotating whose 'turn' it is to go, of course! : ) We are about to put a set of carseats in Jeremy's truck, which will make it easier to take them on little adventures.

We find it's a break for US as much as it is for them...after running after two toddlers, it is so much easier to just have one out with me!

Sadia said...

It's hard, isn't it, to find one-on-one time. Lucas prefers to bathe our girls apart for precisely this reason. I think I'm going to have to schedule a monthly sitter so that I can spend some time alone with each of my girls - they so enjoyed their "special" days.

Andrea said...

What a great idea! I am embarrassed to say I can count on one hand the times I have bathed Molly and Luke at different times. I am pretty sure it was only because one of them did something to merit a bath washing! Of course I know their bath time together will be coming to a end shortly. I still need to decide when that time will be. The same thing rings true for outing. I can probably count on 2 hands the time Todd and I have only taken 1 somewhere. I do agree they need their one on one time with Mommy and Daddy! That is something I have been wanting to work on. Thanks for the reminder!

reanbean said...

I was really worried a few months back about the fact that we do very little one-on-one time with our kids. We had a situation where we were out yard sale shopping and T decided to take Buba home because he was excessively fussy (the beginning of HFMD). Tiny was horribly upset and then completely retreated into my shoulder. It made me feel as though I'd done them a huge disservice by keeping them together so much. But in the last few months, T and I have spent more one-on-one time with the kids, mostly in our own home and sometimes while out running errands. It's not usually planned but just sort of happens. He'll be reading with Tiny, and I'll sit down and do a puzzle with Buba. Or we'll each have a kid in a cart or stroller while shopping and just head off in different directions to pick up items and make the trip go a little faster. I know it's not the same as each of us taking one out for a mommy or daddy date, but right now it's what works. And I suppose it's better than nothing.

MultipleMum said...

This is always an issue for us. So time poor with the twins + two others. The Minx and I sometimes have a 'girls date' leaving Dew Drop with his brothers and Daddy (no 1:1 for him in that mix!). Having said that, Dew Drop gets plenty of 1:1 in the night because he still is up all night and often sleeps under my arm :(