Exercising Their Independence in the Mornings

By and large, I have maintained the same wake-up routine with the girls since they were itty bitty.  They call for me when they wake up…I go into their room, give them lots of hugs and kisses…they use the bathroom…and we head downstairs to start the day.

It’s VERY rare for them to “sleep in”.  Since they got their “OK to Wake” clock when they were about three, they very rarely ask to get up “early”, but I can probably count on two hands how often they have slept past 6:30.

I just imagine B waking up at some point before 6:30, and waiting with baited breath for the green signal that it’s OK to call Mommy.  Sissy usually joins in the chorus, and our day begins.

Very occasionally, Baby A is still asleep.  A handful of times, B has recognized this and slipped downstairs by herself.  She has been SO proud!  Of course I know she enjoys her solo snuggles with Mommy.  And sometimes she gets double goodbye kisses from Daddy, to pass along to her sister when she wakes up.  But as much as anything, I think B loves the idea of “treating” her sis to some extra sleep…taking care of her in that way.

And then, when A does wake up, B loves to go upstairs with me and tell her good morning.

I love the glimpse of independence from B, particularly in a routine I’ve {purposefully} kept the same since the girls were born.

When the girls get up, we usually come downstairs and play for a bit before breakfast.  After breakfast, there’s usually more play time (on non-school days, that is), while Mommy tries to sneak in some coffee.  At some point in the morning, we’ll switch gears and head upstairs to get dressed and “officially” start our day. 

I usually make a suggestion about the type of outfit to wear, based on the weather and what we’re doing.  The girls are mostly agreeable…sometimes wanting to match…sometimes wanting to coordinate…and sometimes wanting to wear completely different things.  Unless we have something special to do, I have been letting them guide their dress, as long as it’s weather-appropriate.

Over the past couple of months, the girls have surprised me here and there by getting dressed completely by themselves.  One day last week, they came downstairs with a “Ta-Da!!!” to show me they’d chosen their Alabama jerseys for the day.  (It was a very proud moment for me!)

Of course, sometimes they come down in something a little more “creative”…

…and that’s OK, too.  I love seeing how proud the girls are at taking care of themselves…

...even if it’s a little bittersweet for this sentimental mama.

What a Difference a Rug Makes!

In our old house, the girls spent more than 90% of their waking time in our den.  It was a baby-proof haven when they were younger, turned into the place where all their toys were organized as they got older.  They played…and read…and pretended, frolicked…and fought…and danced.

Long, long before the idea of kids came into the picture, we searched for a house with a kitchen that opened into the den area.  I had entertaining and cooking and TV-watching in mind, and little did I realize at the time, it was the absolute perfect set-up for kiddos, too.

The majority of the girls’ waking hours were spent in the den, and so were mine.  When I wasn’t playing with them, I was in the kitchen, making a meal or doing the dishes, or folding laundry on the kitchen table.  I could be [mostly] focused on something else, but still be within arm’s reach of the girls.

9 months!

When we built our new house, we wanted the same set-up between the kitchen and the den area.  We have a playroom upstairs for the girls, and a rec room in the basement, but we still wanted the intimacy in the heart of our house. 

We have a great new kitchen and a beautiful new den.  Missing, though, was a big part of the equation.  We have hardwood throughout the main floor.  We knew we would buy a rug for the den, but we didn’t realize until we moved in how critical that rug would be to our sense of family.

We were all, understandably, a bit out of sorts after our move.  Once we had everything unpacked and organized, though, it still felt as if our routine was awry.  The girls loved their new playroom, and we all enjoyed the run-around space in the basement…but something just wasn’t quite right.

As beautiful as our hardwood is, it’s just not very cozy.  We all spent very little time in the den.

When we finally got a big area rug, about 2 ½ months after we moved in (long story!), we breathed a collective sigh of relief.  Things were right again.

The girls still play in their playroom, and we still have some mean games of keep-away in the basement, but the first thing in the morning, we’re reading books or putting together a puzzle in the comfort of the den.  While I’m in the kitchen, the girls are oftentimes hanging out there, just a few steps away from me.  And I couldn’t have imagined Christmas morning had we been sitting up straight on couches the whole time.  Our family is definitely a spread-out-on-the-floor, cuddle-up-together-with-a-blanket, build-a-pillow-fort kind…and for that, a comfortable floor is a must.

Just turned 5!

What a difference a rug makes!

Goodbye, Nighttime Bottle!

That’s a little over-dramatic…as our girls haven’t actually had a bottle since they were 15 or 16 months old…but we have been holding on to their nighttime milk routine until just recently.

When the girls were infants, countless people told us to “stuff them full” before we put them to bed for the night, to get them to sleep as long as possible. Of course there’s only so much “stuffing” you want to risk with the wee ones, but I appreciated the concept.

Once the girls were a few months old, we had worked up to a rather sizeable bottle of milk, particularly before bedtime. We were blessed with really good sleepers, but the idea of them staying full overnight still made sense to me, and that seemed like a bit of insurance, at least psychologically.

We proceeded in similar fashion until the girls were 18 or 20 months old, and we started to have MAJOR issues with leaky diapers. I tentatively cut back their 12-ounce sippy cups to six or eight ounces. That didn’t directly solve our diaper issues, but I learned that my almost-two-year olds didn’t wake up from hunger, either.

Fast-forward to Round 1 of potty training, when the girls were about 27 months old. Baby A was waking up at the CRACK of DAWN to use the potty.

At that point, I further reduced our end-of-day cups of milk, to about four ounces.

A quick poll of my mommy friends revealed that most had long ago abandoned a nighttime milk routine…but this mama just wasn’t quite ready.

I loved the idea of one last snuggle with our baby girls, just before bed…the same sweet snuggles we’d been enjoying since Day 1. The girls seemed attached to the routine, too.

A couple of weeks ago, though, one of the girls asked for milk with supper (as opposed to water). On a whim, I told her she could have milk at supper, but then she wouldn’t have any before bed.

Both girls agreed. They drank a big cup of milk (I felt safe giving them more than their four-ounce allotment), and there was no fussing before bed.

For the next couple of nights, I gave the girls the option of milk at supper or before bed, and they continued to choose supper. We’ve officially decided that’s our new M.O.

And while I do miss those extra snuggles, it gives us a little more time to “snuggle proper” over our bedtime story.

And – it may be a coincidence – but the girls are more consistently sleeping until 6:30 in the mornings…and I think that makes us all feel more snuggly.

Another Mommy Milestone

As I reflect over the past 21 months, there are so many amazing milestones…the first smiles, the first steps, and the first words.

And as I step back a little further, there are also several notable “mommy milestones” that I’m also really proud of…like the first time I fed the girls by myself...the first time I took them out by myself...and the first time I took them to the pediatrician by myself. (That last one is still a major feat for me, each and every time!)

For each of these endeavors, there were all sorts of pep talks involved (me, to myself and I, that is). There was a heck of a lot of planning, and some good, old-fashioned tragedy rehearsal, too. (What if one of the girls crawls out the front door of the pediatrician’s office, and I’m too busy with the other, who might instantaneously learn to swing from the curtains, to notice???)

This weekend I recorded another mommy milestone…the first time I was alone overnight with the girlies.

At 21 months old, that shouldn’t be a big deal, right? Right. And it wasn’t…but that didn’t stop all manner of tragedy rehearsals in my head.

Honestly, though, my biggest fear was breaking the girls’ routine…especially their bedtime routine. I live and breathe by the girls’ schedule, and so my tragedy rehearsals were less about a middle-of-the-night snowstorm, warranting a trek in blizzard conditions to buy firewood, two sleepy babies in tow. No, we have had a good thing going with the girls’ bedtime routines for oh, about 18 months, and Mama don’t mess with it, no way, no how.

With only two hands to manage a total of twenty fingers and twenty toes, we did have to compromise some of our bedtime rituals…

Instead of cuddling with the girls in the bedroom for their last cup of milk and bedtime story, they drank their milk in their highchairs (which are not very cuddly).

While Baby A sat in my lap in the den for their bedtime story, Baby B took the opportunity to run laps around the room, draining out the last few drops of energy from the day.

Instead of sitting snugly in Daddy’s lap while Mommy brushed their teeth, the girls had to stand in their pack-and-play while Mommy wrangled their mouths open.

Despite these interruptions to our nighttime structure, though, the girls went to bed – 20 minutes early, at that! – like champs.

And what did Mommy do after the girlies went to bed? I enjoyed total control of the TV while I cleaned the kitchen like a mad woman. And when I finally went to bed, I read to my heart’s content without one grumble to “turn off the light already!”

Fortunately none of my tragedy rehearsal scenarios reared its ugly head while Hubby was away, but I was glad to be back in the comfort of man-to-man defense the rest of the weekend.

With an overnight alone with the girls behind me, I guess I can start to sweat about the next mommy milestone…maybe an out-of-town jaunt, just the girls and me?

Or maybe I’d better just relish this small accomplishment for a little while. There’s no need to anguish over something that surely won’t happen until the girls are at least ten years old.